|
Mother of
the Groom's Responsibility The
mother of the groom is often at a loss as to exactly what role she plays
in the marriage of her son. This is even more true when she has not
participated previously in a wedding for a daughter or other sibling.
The following rules of etiquette are shared to increase the joy and
fulfil the traditional responsibilities of the mother of the groom.
Her responsibilities include:
- The first rule of etiquette to be followed upon
receiving news of the impending nuptials is to initiate contact
between the families. Introducing herself and her husband to the
bride's parents is her first responsibility. This may be as simple as
making a call to the bride's mother and telling her how happy she is
about the engagement or an informal invitation to dinner at their
home. If preferred, dinner at a nice restaurant is always in order.
This may be with or without the couple in attendance.
If the parents live far away, a friendly letter is
appropriate. A snapshot of the family and maybe even one of her son as a
small child is always welcomed by the bride's mother and is a kind
gesture.
- The importance of providing an accurate and timely
guest list can neither be over emphasized, nor the importance of
sticking to the guidelines given her as to the number of guests she
many invite. Remember to include zip codes.
- It is the bride's mother who will first select a
dress for her daughters wedding. A gown of complimentary color and
similar styling is then chosen by the mother of the groom. She must
wear long if the bride's mother wears long or short if she wears
short. The color should not match the bridesmaids, nor the brides'
mother, but compliment both.
- Reservations for out-of-town guests, invited by the
groom's family, are the responsibility of the mother of the groom. It
will be much more convenient if a block of rooms are reserved at a
nearby hotel, which is near her home.
- It is the responsibility of the groom's parents to
host the rehearsal dinner. This can be as simple as a salad potluck
with paper plates in the backyard or as elaborate as an exotic dinner
with live entertainment in the finest restaurant. Everyone who takes
a part in the ceremony is invited to the dinner. It is proper
etiquette to invite the spouse or significant other of those
participating, and the parents of children in the wedding.
- Scheduled family photographs, prior to the wedding,
will dictate the groom's parents time of arrival. If photos are not
scheduled to be taken before the ceremony, the arrival should be no
less than one hour before the appointed time
- As the wedding begins, the groom's mother will be
escorted down the aisle, to the first pew, right-hand side, by the
head usher or a groomsman who is a family member. A nice touch
includes the groom escorting his mother down the aisle. As the groom's
mother is escorted to her seat, her husband will follow along behind.
However, if the parents are divorced, the father of the groom will
have been seated previously, two pews behind the mother.
- The role as mother of the groom, in the ceremony,
may include lighting the family candle on the altar, along with the
mother of the bride. Family candles are lit after the candle lighters
have left the altar area, and prior to the entrance of the wedding
party.
- The first official duty of the mother of the groom,
during the reception is to stand in the receiving line greeting guests
and introducing her friends and family to the bride and her family.
Traditionally she stands between the bride and her mother. If the
fathers of the couple choose to stand in the line, she will stand
between them.
Print Version
Return to Etiquette
|
Bridal Resources
|
